Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

2 black men beat 9 white men in basketball. Why is this so? They were clearly out numbered.

What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

._____________________. Whale!

What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

What's yellow and lays in a tree? Tweety the Whore

why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

Priority parking for hybrid cars

A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

Who has, there are like... Well actually I might have watched them all, downloaded them in a torrent... A LEGAL torrent of course... NOT. Well, you get a hint, it looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, and its a trick question since Mickey Mouse was not actually drawn by Disney, so yeah.

Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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