a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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How do you save a black man from drowning? I don't know GOOD!

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Whats funnier than 24, 69

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Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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