A handicapp walks into a bar

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Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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poop

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was hungry. Thats why.

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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Why did the black guy flunk out of school? Because his socio-economic conditions and his lack of support from his parents didn't provide optimal learning conditions.

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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You're*

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how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

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What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

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The Christian Bible.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

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What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

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Your grandma's cookies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops