What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

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Womens Rights

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A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

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What is similar between women and puzzles? Neither had the right to vote before 1920. Puzzles still don't

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r u smart..... or ur black

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

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Why did the black man almost go to jail? He rolled a 6 in monopoly, if it was a 7, he would've been sent straight to jail without passing "go"

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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Sarah Palin

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One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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what is big and green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A snooker table

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Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

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Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

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A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

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if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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Cheese stick

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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