Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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i'm funny

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

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Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

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Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

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women's rights.

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

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Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

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Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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