Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

Mexicans are like waffles

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

A homeless man comes home from work.

Yes.

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

Jews...

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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