What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

400 asian people walked in a bar

Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

You copy and paster!

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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