why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down -3

good one jess !!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing, animals are in capable of formal cumunication.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? The black guy is a sentient human being, and the bucket of shit is just a metal container filled with feces

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why won't lance Armstrong survive 2012 Because he has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops