Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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Politics

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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Why is the little boy so smart? He tries in school and hes asian

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Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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http://richardfigures.com/

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What did the frog order at McDonalds? Nothing, it's a frog.

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

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why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

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Rigo your a stupid ass

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

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QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

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what do you call a black man that sells drugs

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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Autism speaks but not really

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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