What did the blind man say to the train conductor? Nothing. He was mute too.

I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

How did the baby cross the road? .......... It was stapled to the chicken.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

what happen to covietz when he licked his balls? nothing he likes the taste

Womens Rights

Yo mama is so so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

P.E.N.I.S P-enis E-nis N-is I-s S

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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