A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

weston cage

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

So you go home and get on the computer. You have no internet so your stuck playing pinball.

you know you are a prostatute when your report car is full of Ds

What did the toaster say to the raisin? Nothing. The toaster was mute and the raisin had lost his hearing in a terrible full-contact origami accident.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

What's that in the road.... a-head?

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

A bear walked into a bar and said to the bartender," I'd li.........................ke one beer please. " The bartender replied, " Sure. But why the big pause? "

-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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