What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

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Why did the chicken cross the rode? It was being chased by a fox and did not want to be eaten.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

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"who you calling pinhead" tell me you know what thats off

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O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

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How did the girl get her Mardi Gras beads? She purchased them at a reasonable price from a party store.

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What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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Wy did the chicken?

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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bees knees

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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A women walks into a kitchen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops