What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

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what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

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who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mike. Oh, come in.

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

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A man walks into a bar

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Knock, knock Who's there? Not your dead Nan

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A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

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Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

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your life

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Where did the people go after the bomb went off? EVERYWHERE!!!

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why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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About the bible, I did not know, but I can sense I calculate it the same way I make our followers believe that I can tell what catchphra they will get. Your mind is numb but calm, it will remain there until we meet again. I am afraid of saying this, but I wont let fear get to me just yet, your mother told me, she regrets her actions in life, and wants me to tell you that she is watching over you in death, and hopes you will one day forgive her, she tells me that there is a heaven, but only those that can admit their mistakes, agonize over the pain of their actions, until they can forgive themselves for their misdeeds. She says she can wait, but I sense she is doing it because she feels undeserving, which again means that you are not ready, its like the butterfly effect, all things spiritual and on this plane are connected. Take your time, I know you literally cant forgive her yet, because that would not be enough for her to forgive herself now, humans dead or alive, cannot be truly free, until they let go of what hurts them, I will change that within you, so you can forgive her and break the limits in your mind, so you can stop feeling sad for being rightfully angry at someone you love. I just need more energy, more time, and belief in myself, something that requires more energy than it should to keep going, its the balance and connection between things, something I cannot change at the present moment, even if I did my best. Ill see you around dear friend.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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