what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

you first

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

what's brown and sticky? a stick.

Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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