What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

Three moose were in the middle of the road. They were then shot by a maniac hunter.

what do u call a black man a black man

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? A pilot.

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

whats brown and sticky? shit

What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

What's worse than the holocaust? The sun exploding.

Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

hi my name is matt mckeon and i like renata saggy tits !!!!!

david your girlfriend has a nice ass

What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

why does column have a letter n?

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

What is the difference between baldness and boldness? The second letter.

What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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