Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Joe Alfon walkes into hell, The devil say: " hi" And joe burns to death

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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NOTICE: If you have noticed this notice then you will have noticed this notice is not worth being noticed

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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What's black and white and red all over? Two biracial gay guys boning a can of paint...

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

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you and your family will die tonight

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Hi what I lug you

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A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

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A duck walks into a bar he buys a drink and says To the bartender "Put it on my bill." the duck is charged With $800.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

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What is a black man's favorite fast food restauraunt? Varies.

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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