You see how lame this is?

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Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

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why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

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What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

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Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

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HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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