Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Q.What do Santa Clause and a grape have in common? A.They both have beards. Except for the grape.

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leon harney ya pikey

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary? A: According to the Oxford English Dictionary (second edition), it is "Pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism."

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Shut the cork up!

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How do you spell eight? 8

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit.

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

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Why are you so stupid? Becuse I spelled because wrong

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What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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