What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

Knock Knock Go Away

How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

knock knock

In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

A man walks into a bar.

If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

Knock knock! *no answer* KNOCK KNOCK! *still no answer* the person who was knocking finds a note sticked on the door and it says: i will be away for 2 weeks

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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