I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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