Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

thumb_up thumb_down -61

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

thumb_up thumb_down -163

why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops