What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

i like cats

4 is half the number 8 is.

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

America

Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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