Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops