What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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i like cats

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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