Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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Jews...

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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