ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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