once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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No I do not think that, that would be a wasted thought.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

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Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it’s all play.

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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Justin's humor

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Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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