How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

Roses are red, Violets are unicorns, This s h i t doesn't make sense, Refrigerator.

You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

9

what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

School

Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

what did the boy say? please please please please goout with me

A jewish man, a black man, and a redhead walk into an electronics store. Because they work there.

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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