Chuck Norris can cook ramen noodles with a microwave.

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Do you believe this will change?

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What killed the name cool? Coolio

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What did I do last night?work

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Roxanne's hat looks like a condom

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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Want to hear a Joke? No.

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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try slamming a revolving door

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Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops