Why did the girl fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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"You two form fours while I get the other one"

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Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

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Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

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What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

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Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

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What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

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How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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