QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

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What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

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Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

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What did God say when he mad another black guy? Danmit i burnt one again.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

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donald................duck for president

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A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

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This is not a joke or is it

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One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

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What did the Nazi say to the farmer? Sie sind Juden versteckt

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Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You tell him to do so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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