There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

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The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Hillary Clinton

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Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why did the lonely man stop talking? He was alone.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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