A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

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Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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whats big fat and very annoying your little brother

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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Why do Mexicans get made fun of? Because they are Mexican

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

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7

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

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What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

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Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

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Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

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why shouldn't hellen keller drive? because she's a woman

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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