Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

What do you call it when a cave man pisses himself running from a t-rex? Historically incorrect.

what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

Whats worse than 1 bee sting... 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings... The hollacaust Whats worse than the hollacaust... 3 BEE STINGS!!!

whats up fuch you bitch

Why don't you play uno with Mexicans? Because they collect all the green cards.

Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...