There are two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Holy shit its hot in here!" The other muffin says, "I concur..."

What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

... i forgot the joke :p

Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus? He got hit by a bus and died.

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

Your mom.

Why did the child cross the road? Her parents were abusing her and she wanted to get hit by a car.

canaan and mallory

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

There was a dog walking down the street with his GF. The dog can have a GF and can talk because this is an anti joke. Then the dog broke up with his GF because he was unhappy with her scent. Dogs are weird that way. Then, sobbing, he saw something through the blur of his tears. The county fair was open! Elated, the dog ran to the fair and waited n the ticket line for a long time. He waited so long, he almost exploded. Once he got to the end, he reached in his coat pocket (yeah, the dog is wearing a coat. It's cold), and found no wallet. FUUUUUUU! By the time he got back, the fair was closed for the day. The next time he came back, he had a hard time getting through the line. When he did, he raced to the ferris wheel. Halfway up, the ferris wheel stopped. CWAP! The neckst daey, thee dwawg whent two the ferries weele and went up. Yay. At the top, he saw his house! there was a chicken crossing the road. WTF? Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Phuck yeah.

How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

test

Technically I did not try to, but I made you believe I tried in vain, so your subconcious is unable to register that it is under a state of trance, you could deny it, but you are in a state of trance right now. So how big are your breasts?

what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Cus 7 had AIDS and it was bleeding all over the place!

Whats black and hangs from trees in my backyard? blackberries..

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't. Before it could cross, it was killed and then consumed by an average American

Jersey Shore

why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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