Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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PSN IS UP

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

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Knock knock. Racism.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

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I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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Trashcan!

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A random guy walks into your house and says hi. You say SHUTUP

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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