Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

what do u call a black man a black man

Why did the fridge cross the road? Because Sally has no arms

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

what did one black man say to the other black man? hello

Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

My life :(

Why are you angry dude? I can't see my forehead

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

shauns beautiful

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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