What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Marla should be home by now, it's nearly 6." He was unaware he had lost his tractor until the next morning.

Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

Gay Rights

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

Davey Peterson.

kieran scott has a huge back

What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

Do you like your life? No. OK.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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