Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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i died. new product by steve jobs

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The black man leaves the strip club.

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Q: What's worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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Your existance.

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Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

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Your mom is fat

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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