Why was the boy sad? He had just had his legs amputated and will never walk again.

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

Why did the dog eat poop?

what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

penis haha

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

Who could be happier than a kid at a candyshop? A necrophiliac in a morgue

So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

There was an american man on the way to work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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