A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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