A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

What did the hungry man do? He ate.

Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

A random guy walks into your house and says hi. You say SHUTUP

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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