What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

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My mom always said it was fun to jump into a pile of leaves... That was before she was devoured by a 10 ft. scorpion.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

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josh roberts goes to church to take advantage of religiously confused young boys

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Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

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What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

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Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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thre guys walk into a bar then goes to sit at a booth and the three guys have to go to the bathroom so they ask a waiter to safe they booth while they go to the bathroom 30 min later and they are still not back so the waiter goes by the door and one guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing" and the guy says " blowing bubbles " then goes and sit down " then the second guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing " and the guy says " blowing bubbles" and goes and sits down then the last guy come out and the waiter says " let me guess blowing bubble " the guy says back "no i am bubbles "

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

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READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

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Man 1: Your lifes a joke Man 2: Your talking to yourself Man 1 klled himself Man 2 had cancer

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What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

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Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

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How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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what do u call a black man a black man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops