Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

what do u call a apple a apple

Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

What did the hungry man do? He ate.

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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