What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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what do u call a apple a apple

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

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What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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