Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

What does the scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!

Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

A blode takes a trip to her favorite restaurant. She arrives safely. After consuming a delicious meal she dies of cancer.

What's clear and wet? water

Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

Yo mama so fat that.....NooNoooNooooooo (strips)

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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