How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

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you

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What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

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A Blonde, a brunette, and a redhead where hiding from the police They were all shot and all died because they were playing Grand Theft Auto 5

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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What's fat and ginger? My dog.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

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- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing.

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Bob dole

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What did the T-rex say to the elephant? i like bananas

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bees knees

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Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

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Why do animals on the side of the road stink? Well they don't, you just think they do when in reality all it is, is there insides rottening From prevous days of exposen of the air now as far as I know all the little baby squrriel Wanted was it get his nuts in the road and it bring back to his starving family counting on him to bring Food to the tree next thing you know a soccer mom's van ran the poor baby squirrel over. Now me knowing this squirrel myself (don't ask me how) he wanted to go out in style you know get ran over by a mustang or a lambo not some bitch ass mini van with sliding doors and a dvd player convinit for the kids to watch spongebob.... man I bet that squrriel was pissed!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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