A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

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what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

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Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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where does a person with one leg work? anywere

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What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

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Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

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Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

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Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

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Yd the chicken cross the road? To SAVE THE WORLD

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whats worse than having your sextape leaked to the media? not being a kardashian when it happens.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Why did Jane get pregnant Because she bought a man's semen and put it in her vagina.

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A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Person 1: I have one question: What are those?!?!?!?!?! Person 2 : Their shoes you Dimwit. Person 1: (runs away crying) -by Mekkhi

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what does it mean when Justin Bieber sounds like a boy someones hit puberty

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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