Ill do a lot more than just try you, anyways, technically I learned to play the piano as a kid, but now I play on a small cheap keyboard (the musical kind) and sincerely, I kinda suck at it now, my abusive parents expected perfection beat the shit out of me blahblahblah, thats really all of it, trauma. My senses, well, when I was a kid I was terrified of gravity (one of the rarest fears in the world) because I had no idea I was consciously shifting things myself. So lets say... If I somehow end up hanging upside down, I just shift it, so my brain believes I am not and I experience no discomfort, there is a lot more to it, ill tell you, damn nose wont stop bleeding and my waifu got a bit scared, she got some bad bronchitis and she still has not recovered a 100 percent, but its just the cough now though... Lets just say that my ability to balance, is about 300-500 percent higher than any regular human, and that I can stand on one leg enough to beat the guiness record book 50 times... ...IIIIF I was in good shape, which I am not.

once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Hollocaust. What's worse than the Hollocaust? 3 bee stings.

What's funnier than 68? Will ferrel

What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

Andy Carrol

Guy #1: Knock knock Guy #2: Whos there? Guy #1: Interrupting murderer Guy #2: Interrupting murd.... Guy #1: STAB!!!

What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

whos gay rusty kohlen hit him up on facebook!

There is no I in Pie except for the I

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

Why is the little boy so smart? He tries in school and hes asian

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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