- Anti Joke

How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

How do giant spiders like to spend their weekends? Eating Orphans.

Whats the greatest part of buttsex the refrigerators

Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

Look whos talking Matt Critchley

TOBUSCUS

brandon ya twwat

why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

how do you fix a family? Someone gives in

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

69

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

Did you hear about the deaf kid? He didn't.

Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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