Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

YOU

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

What is worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your worm!!!

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

Poop swing

penus

A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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