Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Chinese drivers.

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YOU

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two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

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Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

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Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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