What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

Knock Knock Yes?

Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

What is the best kind of necro? Dead necro.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What swims in the ocean? Fish

The joke below is absolute shit.

Q: What's worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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